my friend Janae

Today my son and I went to play group at the park. We had fun- he with his friends, and me with mine. We all kept an eye on our kids while enjoying each others company. All was going well until 1 little girl hit another little girl- not so much because she was mad, but just because of the reaction. The mom of the hitter was quite embarrassed and the mom of the hittee was very understanding. The mom of the hittee is my good friend Janae. I learned so much about her from this incident.

She is very patient and understanding. She looks at a situation from all sides, before reacting. She imagines what it would be like to be in the other persons shoes. When the hitter, hit the hittee again (after being told not to, etc etc) Janae calmly told her child it was ok and that if she didn’t like being hit to tell the child doing the hitting that she didn’t like it. Then Janae demonstrated a nice behavior to the hitter, and had them practice the nice behavior with each other.

Janae is a tactful person. The mother of the hitter was quite embarrassed the second time the hitter resumed hitting. She was very open about how they’ve been having problems with hitting, so she was open to any suggestions. When Janae demonstrated the nice behavior to the girls the mom was quite relieved. The mom could have been offended when Janae stepped in to help, but Janae did it in a tactful, peaceful, loving way.

Even though the incident was not involving my child, I’m not sure if I would have responded the same way- with such compassion and understanding. If my child had been the one doing the hitting I would have taken care of it in the way I saw fit, or else if I was at my wits end probably responded like the mother of the hitter. If my child was the one being hit, I typically get on the defensive (not vocally, but inside) Even if Janae was sad for her child (which she was) she was inclusive, and helped to dissipate the tension. Where I typically back away from tension Janae dealt with it and helped to make it better for all involved. Something I need to work on.

It’s amazing how much you can learn about a person from such a small incident. life is made up of small things that shape us and mold us. I know I was influenced for the better by janaes example today- thanks Janae! :-)